How to Keep Children away from Laziness and Excuses

Lord Chesterfield once said “Aim at perfection in everything, though in most things it is unattainable. However, they who aim at it, and persevere, will come much nearer to it than those whose laziness and despondency make them give it up as unattainable.” Laziness and excuses are the two things which spoil the self sufficiency of children. In a way we are also contributing to it by making their false attitude grow by doing things ourselves. 

Laziness makes children ‘good for nothing’ and excuses support their faults. It is an understood fact that we have to be nice with our children and shall not put any pressure on them. But at the same time we have to make sure that they are not taking it as granted. It is our ample monitoring and guidance will only bring up children in the right path. Laziness in kids can be sometimes associated with their physical illness or any mental stress. This needs to be addressed properly by parents so that we can control thing before it gets worse. If this is kept aside, the all other laziness in children is the result of their habits. At very young age we facilitate everything to our children which is a basic necessity but even then when they are grown up we continue to do the same which gives a wrong notion in the children that they need not take any pain for fulfilling their wish. It leads to ultimate laziness during studies also. 

Why do kids make excuses? It’s really not as important to know why they do it as it is to know how to deal with their behavior. When you think about it, we all make excuses from time to time. The same thing children do when they say things like, “The teacher didn’t explain the assignment that’s why I couldn’t do my homework.” And your child is not the only one—all kids try to wriggle out of consequences for their mistakes or for bad behavior. Kids see this happening everywhere on TV, in the classroom, with their friends and sometimes from us. Keep in mind that while your goal is to teach your child to take responsibility instead of blaming others, his goal is probably to get out of being punished.

The possible solution is to train children from young age to be self sufficient and to show the guts to speak out if it is their own fault. Teachers can motivate children in this as they can easily influence children. Many CBSE schools in India have inculcated such personal quality development of children as part of their curriculum.  

Is Sibling Rivalry a Serious Concern?

Sibling rivalry is normal in families with more than one child. It becomes a problem when one child bullies or dominates the other. It's also a more complex issue than it first appears. On the surface, you have two kids who are “at war” who never get along. There can be many reasons for this, but at the core of this rivalry is a common theme that runs through it all: the sense that one sibling is the victim of the other and somehow “less than.” And that child often believes that he gets less love from his parents than his dominant brother or sister does.

 

Sibling rivalry is a difficult and sometimes painful issue for many families, but rivalry and jealousy are a normal part of life. Your responsibility is to help your kids learn to manage the feelings that come along with it. If they don’t, these issues will get carried over into adult life. The feelings of injustice, unfairness, and victimhood that accompany sibling jealousy become even more crippling to confront with later on. There are some ways prescribed by experts in the field to reduce and manage it. 

Hold both kids responsible for their behavior: In many cases of sibling rivalry, both kids are almost equally responsible for the behavior. One child may start to tease the other or call the other a name, which starts a volley of teasing and name-calling. Set up a rule in your house that if fighting among siblings occurs, everybody is going to be punished.  It doesn’t matter whose fault it is, or who started it.

Stop refereeing your kids’ fights: How do you stop getting in the middle of your kids' fights? As long as it’s not a bullying situation, don’t play referee. Don’t become the judge of who’s right or wrong. And don’t try to decide who the worst antagonist is. Instead, you can say, “There’s no fighting in the house, and these are the consequences for your behavior.

De-fuse jealousy: If one of your children is envious of his sibling, then try to downplay it. Don’t make it a big deal. Probably you can just say, “Well, you know, that’s natural, we all feel jealous sometimes. Always point out your children’s good characteristics. Mention concrete things you saw and heard them do, and let them know that you’re valuing their efforts as much as their brother or sister’s.

Ideally, a family is supposed to be a safe place where everyone is loved and everyone is equal. Your children may feel jealous of each other, but again, jealousy is a normal human feeling; it’s a perception. Schools and teachers can also take care of these things and instill love and affection in children towards their siblings like IB schools in India.

Excess Aggression and Anger in Young Children

children with anger

Do you have children with anger problems? Are you exhausted from constantly battling with an angry child who can’t control his temper? All children behave badly from time to time. But when explosive outbursts, violence, or out–of–control anger are ongoing, they affect the entire family and require more serious interventions. Fortunately, we’ve seen that when parents use the right tools, they can learn how to deal with their children’s anger, and teach them better ways to solve their problems.Don’t challenge your child when he’s angry—that’s just like throwing a match onto a pile of firecrackers. There are some tips to overcome such rebellious situations.

Don’t yell or challenge your child when he’s angry: Many times parents deal with angry outbursts by challenging their kids and yelling back. But this will just increase your feeling of being out of control. The best thing you can do is remain calm in a crisis. So don’t challenge your child when he/she’s angry—that is just like throwing a match onto a pile of firecrackers. Just wait until he calms down.

Don’t get physical with your child: It’s important to watch your physical reactions. Remember, you’re lending your children your strength in these moments; you’re showing them how to handle anger. When you don’t respond calmly, your child will work even harder at his tantrum to try to get you to pay attention.  So you really have to tap into some solid parenting skills to handle the outburst quickly and effectively.

Give consequences for the bad behavior, not for the anger: When your child throws a tantrum, starts screaming and really loses it, make sure you give him consequences based on his behavior and not on his emotions. As long as they’re not breaking any rules, I think you should allow them to have that time to be angry. 

Don’t give overly harsh punishments: Giving harsh punishments in the heat of the moment is a losing proposition. The more you try to punish him in order to force him to stop and get control of himself, the worse he gets. Punishments that seem never-ending to your child are not effective, and will only make him angrier in that moment.

"It’s easy to respond to your child's aggression with yelling or anger, but remember, your child is looking to you for cues on how to control his impulses and have good behavior." Even from best schools in Vizag and family children expect the same.

What makes a good teacher

The teachers I admire most are those who remain intellectually curious and professionally vital both inside and outside the classroom for decades. They avoid stagnation at all costs and maintain an enviable passion for children and the learning process. They remain vivid in the students' memories forever because of their creativity, sense of fun, and compassion. 

Good Teacher

I've seen teachers who worked for hours on their lessons, who were scholars in the field fail miserably, and I've seen teachers who, if you give five minutes before they walked in to glance over their material, they could run a class for an hour on any topic under the sun.

Teaching is one of the most complicated jobs today. It demands broad knowledge of subject matter, curriculum, and standards; enthusiasm, a caring attitude, and a love of learning; knowledge of discipline and classroom management techniques; and a desire to make a difference in the lives of young people. With all these qualities required, it's no wonder that it's hard to find great teachers.

The most effective teachers expect great accomplishments from their students, and they don't accept anything less. When teachers believe each and every student can soar beyond any imagined limits, the children will sense that confidence and work with the teacher to make it happen. The best teachers think outside the box, outside the classroom, and outside the norm. As much as possible, top teachers try to make classroom experiences exciting and memorable for the students. They seek ways to give their students a real world application for knowledge, taking learning to the next action-packed level.

The most effective educators bring their entire selves to the job. They celebrate student successes, show compassion for struggling parents, tell stories from their own lives, laugh at their mistakes, share their unique quirks, and aren't afraid to be imperfectly human in front of their students. Fortunately we are very lucky that there so many best schools in India which offer such efficient teachers. They understand that teachers don't just deliver curriculum, but rather the best teachers are inspiring leaders that show students how should behave in all areas of life and in all types of situations. Top teachers admit it when they don't know the answer. They apologize when necessary and treat students with respect.

For those of us aiming to increase these qualities in our professional lives, it can be intimidating to think that we have to do everything all at once. Instead, I recommend choosing one of these qualities to focus on each school year and expand your repertoire slowly but surely. Even the most successful teachers have to start somewhere!

The relationship between children and books

Books are the basis of all knowledge and a love of reading and the written word can lead both child and parent on wonderful voyages of discovery. For no parent can possibly know the answers to the myriad of diverse questions that children ask when learning about the world, but if you can read it is possible to find out anything you wish to know, whether at your local library or on the internet. I remember a young relative asking her mother why the sky was blue and their joint discovery of the answer to that question and the pleasure that the search gave to both mother and child.

Children Books

 Books affect children in many different ways. Early exposure to books and being read to from a very young age have been shown in countless educational research studies to lead to increased concentration in school, a wider vocabulary, an enquiring mind and a greater ability to learn. Children are imaginative creatures and stories feed this imagination which is essential to mental and emotional development. A good imagination is necessary for scientists, engineers, poets, authors, politicians, mathematicians, scientists, and any other career.

Reading to children definitely affects children's growth and development. Through books, children learn languages. They listen to the words and ultimately learn their vocabulary. Children also develop their imagination when looking through picture books and coming up with stories of their own. Books are essential for children's development. Therefore, it is important for parents to spend time reading to their children.

Electronic books are quickly becoming more prominent in the field of education because of their advantages in over traditional printed text books. As more electronic textbooks are produced and utilized in best schools, we must investigate how useful and effective they are in teaching young children the important skills they need for higher learning. Research has shown that when used as a teaching supplement, electronic books have a positive impact on learning. They can be valuable in helping children with their early literacy development, reading comprehension and language development. 

The effect that books have on children is reflected in as many different ways as there are children, but they can be profound and last a lifetime. I still believe that it’s not just what you read, but how you share it with a child that makes the difference. However, it’s clear that the type of book really can influence how you share it with your child and how she or he will participate.